The Emergency Services ‘Cake Fine’ Explained

For those of our civilian readers who may not know, when you screw up in the emergency services, then you are expected to buy your colleagues some cakes as a way of making-amends for your error(s).

Of course, we aren’t talking about the sort of mistakes which could end up with you losing your job (unless you are a Copper – in which case smiling at someone could end up costing you your job).

We are talking about doing ‘things’ such as leaving the log book of your emergency vehicle on the top of your roof as you blast off to the next emergency call.

Or maybe if you happen to put the wrong fuel in your Job car having just come to the end of a 12 hour shift where you had to deal with all of societies numpties in one looooong night shift.

And whilst the ‘cake fine’ is not necessary, if you want to ensure that you aren’t the brunt of your colleagues jokes for the next 50 years (as thats how long you now have to serve for before you can retire) then getting the cakes in is the ‘easy’ option.

 

 

If you work in a small team, then a pack of 6 Mr Kipling Bakewell tarts will probably suffice. If, however, you happen to be on a response team in the Met Police, then you are potentially looking at a round of cakes for 50 of your oppos (colleagues).

If ever I was hit with a cake fine when I was in the Met Police, then I would just pick up the ‘almost’ out-of-date donuts which many high street stores will try and get rid of (assuming the ‘professional’ bargain hunters hadn’t already of beaten me to it)

If you are above the rank of a PC (or Ambulance / Fire / Lifeboat / SAR equivalent) then you will probably be able to afford some half-decent cakes for the troops (not that most supervisors will ever admit to being in the wrong).

I remember one of my old guv’nors drove into a piece of ‘street furniture’ on one of the busiests roads in East London with a response vehicle that had less than 20 miles on the clock.

The look on his face as the Borough Commander drove by him, meant that a cake fine was not suggested as a suitable means of ‘punishment’.

Cakes fine are almost akin to a ‘right of passage’.

If you are young in service, then you probably should put away a couple of quid each month to make sure that the financial implications of a cake fine don’t hit you too hard.

 

One of our followers sent us the above image of some ‘cakes’ which MIGHT be a preferred alternative to Mr Kipling’s’ Bakewell tarts.

However, because the image ‘could’ be construed by some as being sexist / rude, then we can only share it in tomorrow’s (13th April) issue of our popular fortnightly eMagazine (due to be sent to the inboxes of our subscribers at 15:00 GMT).

The good news is, that it ONLY costs £1 / $1 per month to subscribe to our ‘jam-packed’ & ‘humour filled’ publication. Click here to subscribe

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