Emergency Services News
DONATE
No Result
View All Result
  • Emergency Services News
  • Police
  • Ambulance
  • Fire Service
  • Assaulted on Duty
  • Police Pursuits
  • Body-Worn Camera Footage
  • Police Dogs In Action
  • Court Results
  • National Crime Agency
  • NHS
  • Must See Videos
  • Premium Content
  • Guest Blog
  • Night Shift Library
  • Hoax Calls
  • Rewards & Discounts
  • About ESN
  • Contact
  • Privacy Policy
Emergency Services News
No Result
View All Result

Startled Male Calls The Cops After ‘Catching’ A Bag Full Of DILDO’S During A Fishing Trip

by John Johnson
6 August 2018
in Blogs, Emergency Services News, You Couldn't Make it Up
3 min read
0
Startled Male Calls The Cops After ‘Catching’ A Bag Full Of DILDO’S During A Fishing Trip
8
SHARES
400
VIEWS
Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Concerned Angler became worried for the mystery owner of a bag full of strange sex toys

Monday 6th August | by Cop(ex) | @ES_Humour  

This particular story stuck in my mind mainly because I am not a massive fan of fishing, despite the fact that many of my civvy mates are.

Personally, I would rather just dart around on a boat than sit in one spot watching the end of a fishing rod, as if the fishing rod might attack me at any moment – such are the levels of concentration required when you go fishing.

However, like many men and women around the world, my civvy mates enjoy trying to coax a fish to take their bait in the hope that they might be able to reel in the fish, only to let it go again (albeit with serious internal injuries).

But it turns out that catching fish is just one potential eventuality from casting your tackle into the deep abyss of the unknown.

This poor chap, as a prime example, ended up catching far more than he bargained for, when, no-doubt excited by the prospect of a stiff line, he reeled in what he thought would be an epic catch.

You can imagine his shock when, instead of spotting a slimy fish at the end of his line, he found a black bag that clearly must have been in the water for some time.

In a similar situation, should you happen to find yourself in one, then I am sure that most people would want to know what is in the bag.


SG PROMO 1 copy
Owing to Community Standards, we cannot show the entire image.


 

Could it be gold? Could it be wads of cash thrown away by a criminal as they fled from the Cops?

You might think that this is the kind of ‘stuff’ that you would find in a discarded bag; but not on this occasion!

Instead, the happy angler found a bag full of DILDOS – of varying sizes and girths.

There are some unconfirmed reports on the internet doing the rounds that the male called the Cops, worried about the welfare of the ‘owner’ of the Dildos.

Maybe the owner(s) of the ‘toys’ had planned a ‘boat trip’ only to capsize during the voyage?

Perhaps the boat sank because of ballast issues / weight problems in relation to the size of the dildos?

Your guess is as good as ours…

Unfortunately we cannot share the entire image, as it could breach ‘community standards’ resulting in our Admins having to sit on the naughty step for several days.

We will share the image (in its entirety) in the next issue of our popular fortnightly satirical digital magazine, ‘S__ts & Giggles’, where no such ‘community standards’ exist, or ever will exist.

Anyone can subscribe to our £1-per-month digital publication, whether or not you have served in the emergency services, by clicking here —>



⇓

S&G Man

DON’T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE to our popular fortnightly satirical eMagazine, ‘S__ts & Giggles’ which contains ALL of the funniest material that we are not allowed to share on social media!

ANYONE can subscribe and it only costs £1-per-month!

CLICK HERE to find out more




⇓⇓

Story

Got a story or video to share, then CLICK HERE to contact our team!




⇓⇓⇓

INsta UP

Follow us on Instagram 








 

Share3Tweet2

Related Posts

police
Emergency Services News

A Night of Chaos: Sussex Police Officer Seriously Injured Amid Rising Assault Statistics

police cars
Emergency Services News

Stolen HGV Carrying 200 Crates Of Stolen Spirits Rams Police, Breaking Officer’s Ribs, and Drives Wrong Way on M42 Motorway

Surrey Police Mourns Loss of Young Officer Hannah Byrne, Who Tragically Passed Away in Greece
Emergency Services News

Surrey Police Mourns Loss of Young Officer Hannah Byrne, Who Tragically Passed Away in Greece

APPEAL After 80-Year-Old Man Assaulted During Burglary In Dagenham
Emergency Services News

Met Officers Face Misconduct Hearing Over Stop-and-Search Amid Knife-Point Robbery Investigation

Officers Risk Their Own Lives to Bring Wrong-Way Motorway Pursuit to an End
Emergency Services News

Officers Risk Their Own Lives to Bring Wrong-Way Motorway Pursuit to an End

BTP
Emergency Services News

Shock and Outrage: BTP Officer Viciously Attacked While Administering First Aid

Load More

Let us know what you think in the comments belowCancel reply

  • Emergency Services News
  • Police
  • Ambulance
  • Fire Service
  • Assaulted on Duty
  • Police Pursuits
  • Body-Worn Camera Footage
  • Police Dogs In Action
  • Court Results
  • National Crime Agency
  • NHS
  • Must See Videos
  • Premium Content
  • Guest Blog
  • Night Shift Library
  • Hoax Calls
  • Rewards & Discounts
  • About ESN
  • Contact
  • Privacy Policy
© Emergency Services News
No Result
View All Result
  • Emergency Services News
  • Police
  • Ambulance
  • Fire Service
  • Assaulted on Duty
  • Police Pursuits
  • Body-Worn Camera Footage
  • Police Dogs In Action
  • Court Results
  • National Crime Agency
  • NHS
  • Must See Videos
  • Premium Content
  • Guest Blog
  • Night Shift Library
  • Hoax Calls
  • Rewards & Discounts
  • About ESN
  • Contact
  • Privacy Policy

 

Loading Comments...