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New Menu Options For 999? | Anon

by John Johnson
21 October 2018
in Guest Blog
2 min read
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New Menu Options For 999? | Anon
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The following ‘idea’ was sent into our team using the contact details below. We think this could work, what about you? 

‘Anyone think this could catch on?

‘Thank-you for calling the ambulance service. Please select one of the following options:

Press 1 and shout “CLEAR” to be defibrillated.
Press 2 and we will post “u ok hun?” On your social media profile.
Press 3 and we’ll put you through to an advanced practitioner who will explain to you what lemsip is.
Press 4 if you intend to abuse our staff. You will be redirected to option one. Do not shout “CLEAR”.
Press 5 if you are head-fucked on mind bending drugs. Please specify your preferred colour of unicorn.
Press 6 if you are actually ill and require medical assistance. Please be aware we are currently trialling a lie detector and false answers will result in you being returned to option 1.

Thank you for calling and enjoy your emergency.

If you have a blog that you would like us to share with our readers and followers, then please feel free to contact our team of former emergency services personnel by using any of the details below.

If you have an emergency services related story, video (that you have filmed) or opinion (whether its light-hearted or serious) that you want us to share with our readers, then you can reach our team using any of the details below.

We treat all correspondence with anonymity!

Email: emergency_services_humour@outlook.com | Follow & find us on Twitter @ES_Humour | Follow & find us on Facebook @EmergencyServicesHumour

Before you go...

WE NEED YOUR HELP.Here at Emergency Services News, we aim to tell you stories that the mainstream media are not interested in reporting. Whilst the MSM love to berate and ridicule the emergency services, who is there to report on the realities of serving on the front line?

Emergency Services News is currently a loss-making entity. But our team of volunteers, all former emergency services personnel, do not do it for the money.

We do it because we are sick and tired of the mainstream media constantly trying to undermine the men and women who put their lives on the line to keep you and your family safe.

How many MSM journalists who speak ill of the emergency services have actually dared to don the uniform and risk their own lives to save the life of a complete stranger? If you would like to help back our mission of reporting on fact-based news, then please consider helping to support us financially.

You can support emergency services news from as little as £1. It only takes a minute. Every contribution, however big or small, is vital for our future.

Please help us to continue to highlight the life-saving work of the emergency services, NHS and armed forces by becoming a supporter.

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© Emergency Services News
No Result
View All Result
  • Police
  • Body-Worn Camera Footage
  • National Crime Agency
  • Police Pursuits
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  • Court Results
  • Ambulance
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  • Guest Blog
  • Hoax Calls
  • Rewards & Discounts
  • About ESN
  • Contact